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Tuesday, June 7, 2016


     I love living in the past.  In my late 60's I still don't have a cell phone. 
     At the school where I worked. Students would ask incredulously, "How can you possibly live that way?" and I would explain that people did just that for 100,000 years. 
    It seems that every person over the age of 8 has a portable telephone. Why not the Grove Guy? The reasons are many.     I like the simple life. Knowing there is no device buzzing (ringing, chiming) in my pocket gives me great pleasure. Living in the past helps me to stay in the present. 
    Do I feel safe without one? Yes, as safe as I need to be.    (photo  taken with a camera)
If I ever need to call the cops my house has a land-line. Outside the house I''ll take my chances. Chances are I'll be fine. If I do get into, say,  a car accident it will probably be because another driver was staring at a phone instead of the road. I'll borrow his phone to report it.
    The $1000 a year I save can be used for more important things.  Mangoes aren't getting any cheaper.
    Do cell phones cause cancer?  Who knows? For decades the tobacco industry told us smoking was safe. Holding a warm, radiating gizmo next my noggin seems suspicious.
Scarier than cancer are the zombies.

    When I see entire families together, and each one is staring a  phone, I wonder, "How did humanity sink so low?".  I  imagine they're infected by a virulent zombie virus, one created by the electronics industry.  In a sense, they are. 
    E-businesses (and every politician they finance) want us to use cell phones and to buy their latest phone models until our wallets run dry. I'm not playing their game.
   I could have a job that required me to be electronically connected. Thankfully I do not. My classroom had a land-line but I rarely used it. Now, as a retired person, I have one more reason not to be wired in 24/7.
     I have no desire to text. It is such an impersonal way to communicate, another reason people feel less connected to one another. If you want to tell me something, please come by the house or call. I love live conversations. If I'm not there, leave a message. I'll get back to you promptly. 
    Keeping my wife happy is important. Eight years ago I was making plans to go sailing up the coast.  Francesca worried about my safety to the point where she said, "I'll feel much better if you'd get a phone".
     I did. A Target salesman sold me what he called a "cheapo, throw-away, drug dealer phone" for $40.  It was well worth it to give my wife peace of mind. I did have that surprising buzz in my pocket occasionally but knew it was her calling. Only she had my number. It was unique to be talking to her as I bobbed along. When I got home I threw it away.
     Have you every considered living without that black box in your pocket? Consider setting it on a shelf for a day. It could be your own little adventure. I get to live it everyday.
    I still manage to be a communicative person. This blog is proof of that. I also check my e-mail regularly. If you want me send me an e-mail or a letter (with a stamp on it) that would keen. I love living in the past.

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